Our Love Story

Tomorrow Luke and I will be returning to Pau, France to attend a friend's wedding, after nearly four years of being away. Pau holds special significance for us as it is the place our relationship began and I thought I'd take this opportunity to share our love story.

In January 2009 I left Las Vegas to study abroad at the Université de Pau in France. Whilst there I lived with a French woman named Domi and her son, Yann. It was Domi who told me about an English stagiaire who worked for her that she wanted introduce to me. Sure enough, when I checked my Facebook that first night I found a message waiting in my inbox.

Hi Erin,

I stumbled across you on the Pau study abroad group. My boss has just taken in an American called Erin and I put two and two together.

Hope you're settling in and getting on with Domi.

If you want to be shown around or need any advice I'm happy to help. I've been here 4 months and my flatmate is French so we could be useful. Lol.

Luke

PS Domi has my number

Luke and I met that Friday and while I wouldn't call it love at first sight (I don't believe in it) there was a definite connection from the moment we met. We began seeing each other soon after and it was just casual. I was going back home to America and Luke was returning to England after our time together in France after all.

The first night we met at L'Esprit in Pau. Paul-Etienne (L) is our friend getting married.

I don't think either of us ever thought it would turn in to anything serious but much to our surprise it did. We're not sure exactly when, perhaps it was when we went to San Sebastián together, you can read more about that here. Next thing we knew I was going on holiday with him to meet his family and my parents were flying over to France to meet him! As my host mother often teases, meeting Luke certainly didn't improve my French.

 

Meeting Luke's family at Park Güell (Gaudi Gardens) in Barcelona

Meeting my parents at Place Clémenceau in Pau

After my time in France, I spent a month in England with Luke before I returned to America to finish my university degree. Leaving Luke in England was one if not the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I sobbed from the moment I walked through security at London-Heathrow and didn't stop until I landed in Las Vegas.

Having a long-distance relationship was hard, anyone who has ever had one can tell you that. We missed each other a lot and it's difficult to be apart for special occasions. Even when I was enjoying myself I always knew one thing that would make any occasion better - his presence. I never felt like we weren't going to survive the distance. I think a lot of people are sceptics when it comes to long-distance relationships, I myself used to be, but for the right person anything is possible.

In June 2010 I graduated from university (with a BA Honors in Film Studies and French might I add) and after what seemed like an eternity, made the move across the pond to England. You know the story from there.

Luke and I at Disney's California Adventure (December 2012)

Q: What is your love story? Do you have a place that has a special meaning to you?

Erin x

Another Two Years

Today I sent off my application for 'an extension of stay in the UK as the partner of a person present and settled in the UK and for a biometric immigration document'. Otherwise known as England you're stuck with me for another two years. That is if the UK Border Agency allows it!

The forty-six page application took me about five hours in total to complete. Including the time it took for a trip to the bank to collect bank statements (we're eco-friendly in our house, we do paperless billing) and queuing at the post office for twenty-minutes trying to send the damn thing off! I wish I could say the whole thing is an easy process, but I would be lying. It's a ball-ache (UK Border Agency  - if you're reading this I'm sorry, please let me stay I love your country!)

It is forty-six pages of having to repeatedly fill in your name, passport details, contact details, and details about your relationship. I wouldn't mind so much, except I filled in a massive visa application back in 2011 when I first applied to live permanently in the UK. I shouldn't have to fill my details in again. Come on, I'm the blonde American girl who was introduced to her husband in France by her host-mom, it's a really cute story! Surely the UK Border Agency remember mes? Since the number of people who applied for permission to stay permanently in the UK was 126,891* in 2012 alone, I'm thinking maybe not.

The hubby and I often joke that it would be so much easier if we had fallen in love with people from our own countries, but where would the fun in that be? Everyone needs a challenge in life, and managing a cross-cultural relationship is one of ours. I think that's part of the reason why the UK Border Agency made the application so mind-numbingly long, to test if your relationship is real or not. No one in their right mind would take the time to fill in that thing unless they were in love!

So for all of my complaining about this document, I'm glad I completed it. It means I get to stay in a country I love but more importantly I get to stay with the man I love!

Erin x

*According to Home Office's Immigration Statistics: October to Decemember

Pardon My French

"Why learn a language when everyone speaks English anyway?" Every time I hear this, and I've heard it more times then you can imagine, a small part of me dies inside. Okay, so that might be a little melodramatic but the sentiment is still a painful one for me. The truth of the matter is that NOT everyone speaks English and never would I have it otherwise.

There are many benefits to learning a foreign language such as: boosting your intelligence, easing your travel experiences, assisting your career and even aiding your love life. In learning a foreign language I have experienced all four of these benefits in some way or another.

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Intelligence

I studied languages, Spanish and French, throughout my school career. Learning a foreign language has given me a better understanding of my own. For example, did you know you already speak a bit of French? The English language borrows a number of phrases from French, as well as others.

1. "I just got déjà vu." The literal translation of déjà vu is 'already seen' and the phrase has come to describe the phenomenon of having the strong sensation that what you're experiencing has happened before.
2. "He was given carte blanche." In French carte means card and blanche means white or blank. The two words put together in English mean free reign.
3. "We live at the end of the cul-de-sac." Cul-de-sac means a dead-end street but the literal translation of this word in French is something quite vulgar. Let's just say sac means bag and leave it at that shall we.
4. "I'm en route!" En route is a French phrase meaning 'on the way' that is commonly used in the English language.
5. "She was wearing a lovely ensemble" Ensemble can mean 'together' but in this context a more appropriate translation is outfit.

Studying French at university gave me the opportunity to go live abroad in Pau, France. Knowing some French before I arrived was a huge advantage as it made those first few weeks that little bit easier. I was able to get my mobile phone with relative ease and it certainly made the first trip to the supermarket a little less daunting.

Love

My decision to move to France was not motivated by the clichéd desire to find love in a foreign country. I wasn't expecting to be swept off my feet and certainly not by an Englishman. The fact of the matter is, neither of us would have met each other had we not been been studying French at university.

Children will be on the cards for us at some point, and when that happens we plan on moving back to France. Not forever mind you, but perhaps to begin the children's education in France so that they become bilingual. Having bilingual children is very important to both Luke and me as being bilingual can open many doors for you.

Travel

You don't have to live abroad to experience the benefits of knowing another language. Knowing languages has helped me on my travels. Whilst struggling to find somewhere to park in Barcelona, I was able to use my Spanish to ask for the nearest car park. (Although some of the people I spoke to in Spanish decided to respond to me in Catalan.) When lost in Brussels I was able to ask several people for directions to our hostel. The ones who actually responded in French (Belgians also speak Flemish) still couldn't help me but, had I not spoken French, I would not have been able to communicate with the nice police officers who eventually did help us find our hostel.

To this day, whenever Luke and I go abroad we try to learn some basic phrases in the language of the country to which we are travelling. Something as simple as ordering a pizza in Italian really can go a long way with the locals.

Career

Luke and I both use our language skills in our careers. Luke was specifically hired because of his ability to speak French. Luke's company has offices all over the globe, and whilst all employees are supposed to speak English, it can be very beneficial to speak foreign languages. His talent for languages has not gone unrecognised either; his company are paying for him to study German!

While I wasn't hired on the basis of speaking French, I often use it as I work at the European headquarters of my company. When we were organising an event in Paris, the employees of the restaurant, at which we were trying to book the formal dinner, only spoke French. Let me tell you, trying to explain the various allergies of the attendees was no small feat. Besides using my language on a semi-regular basis I am also fortunate enough to have several French colleagues with whom I can practice!

Q: Are there any words used in the English language you can think of with different origins? If you could learn any language other than your native one, what would it be?

Erin x

*This post was part of Kaplan's Inspire Language Learning Blogger Challenge.

San Sebastián Memories

Bad photos, we all have them and some of us more than others. When I got my first digital camera, I thought it would be the end of the bad photos of my disposable camera days. Now I know the digital camera is not a miracle worker - it just put an end to waiting to find out that you were pulling a gormless face that previously might have taken weeks to discover. But what if you could go back a have a retake of one of your bad photos, which would you choose?

When I first read the premise behind Russell's 'No More Bad Photos Competition' I thought it was going to be difficult to choose a photo, but once I sat down to write my entry one photo jumped out at me immediately. It was the first "couple" photo of Luke and I, taken on our first weekend away together to San Sebastián in March 2009.

Luke and I met during my first week in Pau, when we were introduced by my host mother, Domi, who was Luke's boss. (My apologies to the ones who already know this story.) We began dating almost immediately after meeting, but everything was casual. After all at the end of the summer I would be going back to America and Luke to England. The idea of it being anything serious, at the time, seemed impossible.

To this end, perhaps to convince ourselves more than anything, we tried to steer clear of what I would call "coupley" things. We didn't have any photos of just the two of us, if we were in a photo together someone else was always with us. We didn't call ourselves boyfriend and girlfriend. And perhaps most important of all, we didn't have the "so where is this going?" conversation that seems to plague so many relationships.

Our bubble of avoidance was shattered in mid-March when Luke asked if I would be interested in going away with him for the weekend, just the two of us. We considered going to Biarritz, but we had gone there a number of times already with our group of friends. Plus there was a strong likelihood that our friends would get the urge to go to the beach and join us. So we decided on San Sebastián - home of tapas, Basque cuisine, surfing, and the most Michelin star restaurants.

We spent the weekend laying on the beach, eating amazing Spanish cuisine, and visiting the same gelato place more times than I can remember. We taken a number of photos of each other but so far didn't have one of the two of us together. That changed on our last day on top of the San Sebastián Aquarium (we also discovered our mutual love of aquariums) when we finally had our first couple photo.

It is a little dark on our faces, and the pose is awkward because rather than find someone to take it for us, Luke is holding his hand out. But it still makes our photo album because it is our first.We may have fallen in love in Pau, but San Sebastián is where it all changed for us. I had no idea then that three years down the line I would be living in England, married to the incredible man posing right next to me.

We've often talked about going back to San Sebastián, the place where our relationship changed to the more  serious. Someday we will, and we'll pose on top of the Aquarium like we did that day, but this time I think we'll ask a passer-by to take the photo for us.

Remember: The truly bad photos are the ones that don’t exist at all.

Erin x

Entry for In Search of a Life Less Ordinary's 'No More Bad Photos Competition'

Our 1st Wedding Anniversary Celebration

Luke and I celebrated our 1-year wedding anniversary on 3 January 2012. It's hard to believe it was over a year ago now, as I can remember the day as if it were yesterday! With our anniversary date being on a weekday, we decided to properly celebrate it by going to London for the weekend (7-8 January). One of the many redeaming qualities about Milton Keynes is that London is only a 35 minute train journey away. Just think 35 minutes, no stops, and you're in the middle of one of my favourite cities in the world!

We stayed at the Thistle Westminster, not the best hotel I've stayed at in London but for the price (they're having a Winter Sale) and the location (right in the heart of Westminster) it was perfect! As luck would have it our room was ready right when we arrived at 10:00am, so we were able to drop our stuff off, freshen up and go!

We spent the morning walking around Buckingham Palace and St. James' Park, before making our way to Trafalgar Square and the National Portrait Gallery (Museums having free admission is one of the many perks of England). I love London's museums but National Portrait Gallery is my favourite. I first visited it when I was sixteen with my Mom when a friendly tour guide suggested it to us. It always seems quieter than the other museums, which I hope doesn't change since Kate Middleton (or should I be calling her the Duchess of Cambridge now?) is going to be a patron now.

© National Portrait Gallery, London

Data source: National Portrait Gallery, London

After a few well spent hours in the NPG, we made a pit stop into the National Gallery which is having an amazing Leonardo da Vinci exhibit at the moment. Unfortunately the National Gallery is considerably busier than its 'cousin' and the queue/crowd around the exhibit was more than either of us could handle. So instead we walked around the Dutch wing, which Luke jokingly described as "a bunch of pictures of cows or windmills or cows and windmills". Philistine!

That evening we went out for dinner at an Italian restaurant, Il Posto, that is the definition of you can't judge a book by it's cover. We discovered Il Posto with my Mom during my birthday weekend in London, it was right across from the Apollo Victoria (where we were going to go see Wicked). It doesn't look like anything fancy, but the food is simply amazing! The prices are good as well, I mean £7.00 for a pasta dish in London is practically unheard of. It certainly won't be our last dining experience there!

While on Saturday we had visited my favourite museum, on Sunday we visited Luke's - the Natural History Museum. Luke kept pointing out things to me and darting from exhibit to exhibit with the exuberance of a little kid; which happens to be the last time he visited the museum. The museum was a little too packed with kids that didn't watch where they were going for my liking. But I did enjoy looking at the Aurora collection (a collection of multi-coloured diamonds) and the Dinosaur exhibit took me back to my childhood. What is it about dinosaurs that makes so many children fascinated by them? Perhaps it was because we grew up with Jurassic Park, but every child from my generation seems to have gone through a dinosaur phase.

After exiting the museum we took the Underground to Covent Garden for some window shopping and lunch. I was so underwhelmed with lunch that I don't even remember where we ate, although of course I loved the atmosphere. After watching a few street performers we wandered through Soho looking for the giant Waterstones book store that our waitress had told us about. Four storeys of books, yes please! As it happens there are plenty of book stores around Soho,  mostly used/rare book stores. One such store got our custom, even if he did look down his nose at us at Luke paid for his used copy of Dr. No.

By the time we were finished wandering around Soho, we never did find Waterstones, it was time collect our luggage from the hotel and head to London Euston for our train back to MK. As the t-shirts say; I ♥ London!

Erin x

Quintessentially English's January entry for Happy Homemaker UK's Post of the Month Club