Moranthology - A Review

Caitlin Moran has been "writing the fuck out of shit since 1992", including not one but three award-winning columns for The Times. She also shares my last name and has a Twitter addiction that surpasses my own. Basically she is amazing and an all-around badass.

©  Casa Bevron Ltd 2012

This past weekend, I finished reading Moranthology - a collection of her writings from The Times ranging from serious political pieces to downright bizarre encounters. Usually I'm not one for anthology books because I find them difficult to keep my interest. Not Moranthology, I couldn't put it down! Once I was finished one article I was eager to start the next!

I decided to share five of my favourite articles from the book. I thought it would be easy, until I actually sat down to write this thing. I have little pencilled stars next to far more than five! How I narrowed it down in the end, I don't think I'll ever know but here they are:

1. Sherlock Review 2: The Frumious Cumberbatch. Until reading Caitlin Moran I had not seen a single episode of BBC's Sherlock. This review and the one before it (Sherlock Review 1: Like a Jaguar in a Cello) made me realise what an amazing show I was missing. I debated which of these I felt encouraged my prompt decision to go out and buy it. Since watching Series One and re-reading them, I have decided it was definitely the second. The reason, she asks the question that is on all English minds, "Why GOD are there only three episodes of Sherlock per series?"
2. We Only Had Two Transsexuals in Wolverhampton. Long story short, there was a bit of a kerfuffle after a ten-year-old boy returned from the school holidays as a girl. Parents were even going as far as saying that they should have been consulted before hand. Besides being consulted on all parenting matters, it appears the main goal of these parents was to keep their own children in the dark. A round of applause for these parents, putting a child that is already going through a difficult time under the public microscope. Yes, well done all of you. And you're the ones who you think should be consulted for parenting advice? Hmm. The message I took from this piece is anyone, not just children, should be allowed and encouraged to ask questions. Knowledge is power as Captain Planet would say!
3. Libraries: Cathedrals of Our Souls. As a book lover I've always thought of libraries as something to be respected and cherished. The sad truth is libraries are having to fight to stay open. In this digital age, libraries are no longer seen as necessary. More students are using the internet to do research for the term papers. Reading for fun? Why bother when they'll make a film about it in a few years. (Excuse me while I pause to cringe at humanity) For Caitlin libraries are so much more then that, they were a place where she could escape to and she makes a strong case for their continued purpose in society! And please tell me I'm not the only one who while reading this pictured 'little girl' Caitlin a bit like Roald Dahl's Matilda.
4. Unlike Most of the Coalition, I Was Raised on Benefits. This one might actually be my favourite of the entire book because it made me look at people on benefits in a different light. I try not to be too political on this blog, so I hope you can afford me a few sentences. I'll be honest, I looked at people on benefits with a bit of a sceptical eye. The image of council estates I had in my mind is just the tracksuit-wearing stereotype she described. When I saw 'chavs' (see glossary) with the latest gadget, all I could think about was that my hard-earned money had bought. And on top of all of this, I saw people on benefits as most likely fakers taking advantage of the system. This one made me realise that while some of those people are "dodgy, most of them are doing their best..." I'm not saying my entire outlook on the benefits system has changed because of this one article, but I won't be so quick to tar everyone on benefits with the shame brush.
5. The Best Royal Wedding Ever. I love the royal family. I don't go CRAZY for them like some, but I do love them! As such, I loved this piece. Not just because it was about the royal family but it brought back memories of a great day. My greatest regret of the day after reading this, watching it on the BBC instead of ITV1. Yes, the BBC's coverage was to thoughtful, perhaps even a bit subdued but it appears that ITV was just more amusing. Zooming up on Chelsy Davy's (Prince Harry's then girlfriend) tango-coloured face. Describing the Westminster Abbey as "It's very... pretty". Why did I miss this?! Thankfully, Caitlin Moran was able to summarise all of the coverage, including Twitter, in one brilliant column! Thanks Caitlin!

While I've followed @CaitlinMoran on Twitter for a while and read a few of her columns in The Times, this book really made me a fan! I would recommend this book to pretty much everyone, especially writers! At times I woke my sleeping husband because I was laughing out loud! I find her personality and writing style to be inspirational! Maybe she isn't everyone's cup of tea but she's definitely mine!  I'll be adding How To Be A Woman (2011) to my Goodreads 'to read' list, if I haven't done so already!

If you haven't read Caitlin Moran's Moranthology, you can purchase it by going to Quintessentially English's Amazon Affiliate Store or by clicking below! More importantly, if you HAVE read Moranthology, what were some of your favourite columns. Let me know in the comments below or tweet me @essentialerin!

 

Erin x

Another Two Years

Today I sent off my application for 'an extension of stay in the UK as the partner of a person present and settled in the UK and for a biometric immigration document'. Otherwise known as England you're stuck with me for another two years. That is if the UK Border Agency allows it!

The forty-six page application took me about five hours in total to complete. Including the time it took for a trip to the bank to collect bank statements (we're eco-friendly in our house, we do paperless billing) and queuing at the post office for twenty-minutes trying to send the damn thing off! I wish I could say the whole thing is an easy process, but I would be lying. It's a ball-ache (UK Border Agency  - if you're reading this I'm sorry, please let me stay I love your country!)

It is forty-six pages of having to repeatedly fill in your name, passport details, contact details, and details about your relationship. I wouldn't mind so much, except I filled in a massive visa application back in 2011 when I first applied to live permanently in the UK. I shouldn't have to fill my details in again. Come on, I'm the blonde American girl who was introduced to her husband in France by her host-mom, it's a really cute story! Surely the UK Border Agency remember mes? Since the number of people who applied for permission to stay permanently in the UK was 126,891* in 2012 alone, I'm thinking maybe not.

The hubby and I often joke that it would be so much easier if we had fallen in love with people from our own countries, but where would the fun in that be? Everyone needs a challenge in life, and managing a cross-cultural relationship is one of ours. I think that's part of the reason why the UK Border Agency made the application so mind-numbingly long, to test if your relationship is real or not. No one in their right mind would take the time to fill in that thing unless they were in love!

So for all of my complaining about this document, I'm glad I completed it. It means I get to stay in a country I love but more importantly I get to stay with the man I love!

Erin x

*According to Home Office's Immigration Statistics: October to Decemember

A Weary Traveler

Apologies for my unexpected sabbatical from blogging, I assure you I missed you as much as I hope you missed me. My excuse, well I've been traveling for work these past few months and when I haven't been out of the country I've been recuperating or preparing for the next event.

In January my work took my to Paphos in Cyprus, not Syria as my Grandad thought, causing both he and my Grandma to panic. I was there for a little over a week running an event that was part contest trip/part convention for 250 consultants from all around Europe. In Cyprus I was able to practice my French and learn that you should not ask a Dutch man what he is wearing underneath his toga unless you wish to see the man's spectacular leopard-print Speedo. Unfortunately what I did not get to do was workout (despite bringing my gym kit) or in fact even go outside.

A beautiful view of our hotel, captured by our photographer.

Perhaps the highlight of my trip to Cyprus was giving a presentation on digital marketing and the power of social media to the 250 attendees, which included the CEO from America and Europe's Managing Director.

Up on stage at the Cyprus Convention.

Two days ago I returned from a three-day trip to Amsterdam. I did at least have a few hours to explore the city which included a stop to Wynand Fockink, a spirits and liquor distillery that opened its doors in 1679! In the tasting room, they pour the liquor into tulip-shaped glasses so high that the rule is you have to bend down to the counter to take your first sip. I could have stayed for hours, which would have been dangerous considering the liquor went down so easy. Whatever flavour you can think of they had, and let me tell you it tasted exactly like the fruit or sweet it described!

Source

Besides a stop at Wynand Fockink, I learned three things in my time in Amsterdam:

1. Dutch is a difficult language. It appears like most everybody in the Netherlands actually speaks English, but when they are speaking in their native tongue I find it incredibly challenging to understand. I sat through a four-hour product launch and understood perhaps five words. I've been told its similar to German, but that is just as equally confusing for me.
2. The Dutch love chocolate milk. I first noticed it at the breakfast bar in the hotel where there was a giant jug of chocolate milk that kept having to be topped up. Every restaurant and bar seemed to have chocolate milk on the menu. As I was sitting in a café watching the luggage waiting for our trip to the airport I saw so many trays of chocolate milk passing my head. At first I thought the Dutch just must have a lot of children, but no these were grown men in business suits.
3. Bringing a gym kit with you when you're working an event is really pointless. Although I did actually put my gym kit on and go down to the hotel's gym. I got on the exercise for about 10 minutes before deciding I really just did not have the energy. It happens every time I'm traveling: a) I check online to see if the hotel has a gym, b) stuff my kit into my bag, and c) ignore gym kit entirely. I suppose I could leave it at home, but I know the one time I do will be the one time I really want to use the gym!

Now I'm back in England, with no plans to leave the country until 16 July when I head back to Pau, France to attend a friend's wedding. In fact, I doubt I'll be able to leave the country until then considering I have to turn my passport in to renew my visa! After these past few months of traveling, I'm going to need a break.

 

Erin x